Image Source: Unsplash- Good Days Digital
This will be the fourth ship I have sunk in as many days. Usually, I am not so fortunate. I have had bad luck— despite all of the ships I’ve led to their dooms, my end goal has evaded me. It has occurred to me more than once that my target has long since left the sea, and that my search is in vain. But, if I cannot wring the blood from the bones of my enemy, I will wring it from all of those who might have loved him.
As my scales turn to skin and my fins turn to legs, my nails dig into the wooden hull of the ship. I drag myself up towards the deck. No one notices me. No one ever does. I begin my usual routine, slinking around the shadows, trying to see the members of this crew. Whose death am I bringing? Will I feel sorry? The answer to that question has always been, unsurprisingly, that I will not. I am not sure how many lives I have taken, but I have not regretted a single one.
As I ponder this, I notice a man standing across the ship from me. “Man” might be an exaggeration— he is so scrawny and unthreatening that he may very well still be a boy. The wind ruffles his blond hair as he faces the sea. I approach him. He won’t question my presence; sailors never do.
“What is your name?” I ask. He turns around. I hold back a gasp. I have seen him before, I have known him for a very long time. I have been looking for him for a very long time. “Willam?” I ask, choking on my smile. “Are you William Dryden?”
I know that round face, one better suited to a cherub than a devil. I know the rosy pink cheeks on this boy better than I know my own reflection. I know the sweet, chocolate eyes he wears better than I know any of the souls I have collected. I know the blond hair that falls in front of his face as he turns his head, seeming to question my recognition of him.
I used to love that smile, back before I knew what it concealed. I dreamt of his chocolate-brown eyes and drank in his presence in what small opportunities I had.
We were to be married.
“Mora,” he had asked me, with stars in his eyes, “I want to be with you until we die.”
I didn’t know he meant until I died.
I’d accepted his proposal without a second thought.
“Mora,” he had asked me, with a dazzling grin, “what about a wedding in my family’s home across the sea? I have to go there anyway, you know, and I wouldn’t mind making a honeymoon out of our trip back.”
I truly believed that there would be a honeymoon. I truly believed everything he said.
I came aboard the ship without a second thought.
When I was there, the men looked at me with skeptical eyes. Women on pirate ships were bad luck, weren’t they? Of course, I didn’t believe in that, and William didn’t either. We were practical people. Neither of us were very swept up in superstition. I never threw the salt over my shoulder, and he always stepped on the cracks in the sidewalk.
Besides the crew’s initial skepticism, the voyage was delightful. Every night, William and I danced together as the crew played music and sang for us. We ate food which was, admittedly, quite bland, but we did not mind. We had each other. When the ship rocked us to sleep at night, we held each other still, talking quietly until the sound of the other’s voice lulled us each into a gentle sleep.
That was, of course, until the storm came.
I had been staying below the deck. The torrential rainfall, combined with the way the waves crashed violently against the ship, terrified me. I had no interest in staying in that cloudburst any longer than I had to. I couldn’t wait until we made it to shore. I kept myself sane thinking of the wedding we were going to have, the beautiful white ball gown that awaited me on land.
I truly thought I would see land again.
When William knocked on my door, I was too naive to consider any ulterior motives. “I do not want to go out there,” I complained, crossing my arms. “You know I do not like being out in the storms.”
“It has been storming for three days,” William had countered. His hair fell in front of my eyes. I could not see it at the time, but now, I imagine that his eyes were filled with violence, and he wanted to hide them from me. “You must get some fresh air, it is not good for you to be cooped up in here for so long.”
“There is no air out there, only water,” I replied. Still, I followed him out. I trusted him. That was my fatal error.
When we arrived on the deck, the whole crew was there, waiting. The rain pounded against my face, but something about the way the crew looked at me with hungry eyes concerned me more. “William?” I asked, uncertain. “What’s going on?”
He looked at me then. The rain had cemented his beautiful blond hair to his forehead, and I could see his eyes now. He looked at me with a melancholic smile, taking my hands in his. “I am sorry, Mora. It has to be done. Do not forget that I loved you.”
With that, he moved my hands behind my back. Someone else tied them together. “What’s going on?” I asked again, this time with fear heavy in my voice. I began to scream. “William, what’s going on? What is this?”
Two of the crew took hold of my arms, then began to walk me toward the side of the ship. I continued screaming. They held me still at the edge, and I began to calm down. It would have been silly of me to think they were going to throw me overboard. William would never have let them. I saw William making his way toward the front of the crowd of pirates and breathed a sigh of relief. He took hold of me, and the two who had held me walked away.
I looked William in the eyes and smiled, big and wide, sure that he was going to say something rational to explain whatever this was. I didn’t say another word; my voice was hoarse, and I wasn’t sure what I would have said, anyway.
“Neptune,” he proclaimed, looking into my eyes as he did. I furrowed my brow. “Please accept our offering to you, great Sea God, in order for an end to this storm and a safe passage home.”
With that, he pushed me off the ship.
I cannot tell you exactly what happened in those cold, icy waters. I am not sure how I came to be what I am now. There was a shining light, but I could not go toward it. I had too much to live for. And, through all of it, all I could think of was how beautiful my wedding would have been.
There was no Sea God to come and save me. But there was me, and I had the same wrath.
The next time my head came above water, I was something much different than I was before. I could take the form of a human, yes, but even in that form, there was something sinister in me that hadn’t been there before. My voice, which I had wasted on my screams on that horrid ship, had become a source of the kindest lullabies. I quickly learned what would happen if I used it. Ships would crash, sailors would die.
One day, I was determined, William would die.
So what is he doing on this ship, not having aged a day?
“Well, I am William Dryden Junior,” the boy said, holding out a hand for me to shake. I did not take it. “You must have known my father. People say we look alike.” His father. Of course. Foolish of me, then, to have jumped to such a conclusion. William was no alchemist; he could not have preserved himself. Besides, this boy was thinner than William ever was. A bit shorter, too, and not half as charming.
“Billy!” one of the crew called from afar.
The boy shrugged at me. “They want me to sing with them,” he said, as if he felt the need to offer me an explanation for his absence. He ran off, happy to join the rest of them.
That was it, then. This was the ship that I needed to drown most of all. Do this, and I will have finally gotten revenge on the man who betrayed me. What more pain could I bring him than to kill his son? The son, he must have been so proud of, who looked so much like him? Yes, this was my chance. My one chance to get back at William, to truly repay him for what he had done to me. There would be nothing quite as painful, quite as—
“And the ocean is my lover, and my lover is the sea,
And when my voyage ends, she will be at home with me!”
I pause. I know this song. William and I danced to it, before the storm came.
“Now, I know the journey’s dangerous, and I know the journey’s long,
But when I’m on this boat, well, nothing I do is wrong!
And when I see my lover, we will once again embrace,
For the world is large and scary, but it’s nothing we can’t face!”
I turn my attention to the band singing it. They look… Happy. Overjoyed, even.
Something about the way that they sing this song, the cacophony of their off-tune voices drunkenly singing together, is so pleasant. It is nothing like the lullaby I sing. It is loud, rowdy, imperfect, and human. Will I feel sorry for killing this caterwauling choir? For the first time, my answer is yes.
I look out into the calm sea. This time, when I fall into the waves, I do so willingly.
As if looking for proof that I made the right decision, I turn my attention back to the ship. When I do, I see the panicked face of William Dryden Junior. “Man overboard, man overboard!” he yells. He hurries away, looking for something to come help save me.
I swim away. When he comes to rescue me, there will be nothing here but the open water.
This was written by our contributing writer, Elise Lindgren.
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