I’ll start with a disclaimer: I’m genuinely content and grateful for my current roles as a wife, mom, and Realtor. I wouldn’t change my family life for anything. However, there are moments when I realize I’ve forgotten what makes me, Ranice, happy. This happens because I dedicate myself entirely to my husband and children.

Here’s a bit about me: Originally from South Central Los Angeles, California (Cali Baby!), I moved in 2007 due to unexpected events. My family and friends are scattered across the U.S., so meet-ups are rare. I live in South Jersey with my husband, five children, and Miniature Poodle, Deuce. My mom also resides in Jersey, but she works constantly.

I’m sure many women face similar circumstances. Therefore, I want to be candid, and you can share your journey of rediscovering your happiness beyond being a wife/girlfriend and mom.

Do you ever have those rare moments when you’re alone and don’t know what to do with yourself? You know, when your hubby takes the kids out to give you a “break”? You think, “What should I do today?” It’s confusing for two reasons: Firstly, you’re so used to being a wife/girlfriend and mom that you’re lost without your other half and kids. Secondly, you can’t remember what you enjoy doing.

So here I am, trying to figure out what makes me happy again. I seem to have forgotten my own joys, and it’s unsettling because that list of “Ranice’s Little Joys in Life” is fading from memory. Sometimes, I sit back and try to recall what used to bring me joy. “I was happiest when…” or “I remember loving to do…”.

During these “alone” times, I often become frustrated because, before I know it, my husband and children return home, and what have I accomplished? A day filled with nothing because I couldn’t decide what to do.

I don’t want to become resentful toward myself or anyone else I love. I realize that I pour myself into everyone else to ensure they’re happy, but I neglect myself, and my inner joys vanish. It’s like a bank account: you can withdraw, but you’ll end up overdrawn if you need to replenish those funds.

Is anyone else dealing with this? Can you share any advice that might help me and the thousands of other wives/girlfriends and moms out there? Let’s get it together, ladies, and rediscover the basics of who we are beyond being significant others and moms.

Yours Truly,

Ranice

~Think it, believe it, and receive it~

This was written by our contributing writer, Ranice C. Harper.