Fear, self-doubt, and limited beliefs are a stifling combination that keeps one bound to the endless possibilities that await beyond the mind’s eye. Often, it is too hard to see beyond what we live day in and day out. 

Our beliefs about what we can achieve start at a young age because of what parents, teachers, friends, or mentors say about what we can or can’t do. We grow up with those beliefs, which become part of who we are. It becomes our identity––who we believe we are.  

But is that really our true identity? If our parents say, “Money doesn’t grow on trees,” a belief develops about how money is viewed and valued. Or if we grow up believing that life is hard and no matter how hard we try, we never get ahead, so why bother working hard to achieve the dreams we desire? 

In reality, looking past the barriers set up for us as children will push us past those limited beliefs and or fears.  

Easier said than done, you’d say. I can, and I have.  

I grew up in a fundamentally well-rounded home. Both parents worked hard to provide for the family. My father started in the military and then opened his own business in the entrepreneurial world, where I saw the struggles of owning your own business from all sides.   My mother became an RN and worked, then returned to school in my middle years to get her NP. But somehow, in the midst of a loving home with two parents to support me, I still had issues.  

I didn’t think I was good enough. I had low self-esteem. I was not the most popular kid in school; one would say I was a wallflower. 

Fast forward, I married a man who was opposite my personality and pushed me outside my shell. The only way that happened was through self-actualization—years of working through old beliefs and realizing that I was not the best version of myself. 

There are steps to achieve the best version of yourself. First, it takes changing habits and developing new ones. It’s insanity to accept a different result if you’re doing the same thing over and over and over again. We want what others have but are unwilling to pay the price or do what they do to get where they are. 

Often, we look at the end result of where someone is or what they have achieved and think, poof, they have the magic touch, and their success is automatic. But, most often, that isn’t the case.

Changing those habits is hard, like getting up or going to bed late and watching five hours of TV a day or spending that same amount of time on TikTok or Instagram instead of reading a book and feeding the brain.  

I began to read self-help books and find value in myself. I got up at 4:30 a.m. every day and worked on projects that would hopefully turn into results.  

Changing your circle of influence is another way to get past the fear and limits. They say you are the five people you hang around. Evaluate those who are your close friends. If you want to be successful, are they? Or are they barely getting by? Do they grumble and complain? Are they self-motivated or lazy? Do your friends complain and always see the glass half full? 

If that is your circle, let’s face it: that is probably who you are, too. And if you want a different outcome, you have to do the hard thing. 

Change your circle.   

I took responsibility and realized I was like a few friends. If I wanted bigger and better, I needed to find someone who had gone where I wanted to go and get around that. Changing what I looked at, taking on more responsibility, and deciding I could do anything I set my mind to pushed back fears and limited beliefs. It also set me up for greater things in my life.  

Finally, be willing to jump. I took a manuscript that took eight years to complete to finally nail down a deadline and not only publish that book but two others, with a third on the way within a year. If I had never said, “screw that, I may think people would think of me,” and taken the leap, I would never have realized I would be an award-winning author. 

Fear, self-doubt, and limited beliefs keep us bound and in the dark about what possibilities await. You will never know what is on the other side unless you push past those fears and insecurities and go for it.  

I hope you make the decision to go for what your heart desires. Go for it and make it happen. Change your habits, get a new circle, and jump. 

It will be the best decision you have ever made.  

This was written by our contributing writer, Shannon Hrimnak.